Check out John's pages from
~ The Slum Lord 2003 ~

Jeffie and John said good-bye to 2003 during the final Council Meeting of the year on December 26th, 2003.

See ya at the New Year's Eve Party!

This photo taken during The Council Meeting on December 12th, 2003 only shows Jeffie from the waist up because he wasn't wearing any pants again!
During the Council Meeting on November 28th, 2003, Jeffie was:
E. All of the above?

A. Soiling himself again?

B. Smelling Dickie's aroma from last week?

C. Dreaming about White Castle Hamburgers?

D. Enjoying the fact that Beaver was touching him?

E. All of the above?
With deer season on everyone's mind, Jeffie demonstrated the easiest way to catch a Buck during the Council Meeting on November 7th, 2003 was to sneak up behind one and grab him by the tail!

Jeffie let out a horrifically shrill scream during the very special Halloween Council Meeting on October 31st, 2003 when he saw Sir John of the Council's eyes open for the very first time in months!

Jeffie prayed for his friends at The Council during the meeting on October 17th, 2003 because Lord knows they can use all of the help they can get!
After Jeffie's performance two weeks ago, David was thrilled to sit next to his favorite new blues singer during the Council Meeting at Sports Plus on October 3rd, 2003. David even asked Jeffie for his autograph and was happy to buy him a bottle of hooch and a pack of smokes in exchange for what will no doubt be a collectors item someday!
Jeffie stopped the crowd in their tracks during the Council Meeting on September 19th, 2003 when he unexpectedly took center stage and performed a mind blowing rendition of "Damn Right, I've Got The Blues" by Buddy Guy! "We didn't know he had it in him", said Uncle Gary who has known Jeffie for over thirty years. "They called his name and we all just stood there in amazement as Jeffie belted it out. The crowd cheered and gave him a standing ovation as he quietly went back to his chair to have a beer as if nothing had happened. We're all still in shock".
Jeffie and Ronnie had to check the official Council Rule Book on September 5th, 2003 to prove to Dave:
Chapter 23
Paragraph 6

When enjoying French fries, one must share the French Fries with at least one, not to exceed twenty fellow Council Members providing the Council Members are in good standing at the time. If the French Fries are not shared, The Council Member that ordered the French Fries will be in direct violation and therefore must be beaten with 1000 wet noodles at The Council's earliest convenience.


The Management and Staff of The Council had meetings that lasted late in to the night and pondered for hours on just what caption would work best with this photo taken on August 29th, 2003. Our lawyers said that no matter what we printed, we could be in for a law suit, so just use your imagination!


~ August 22nd, 2003 ~

Hi there! I'm Jeffie and I'm lifting my right cheek to try to recreate one of Captain Dickie's wonderful odors! Care to join me?

On August 15th, 2003, Jeffie demonstrated the correct way to pound ones cigarette pack on Chuckie's head to one: help compact the tobacco and two; try to knock some sense in to the boy!

Looking very proud of himself during the Council Meeting on August 8th, 2003, one could tell by the way Jeffie was lifting his right cheek off of the chair, he was attempting to do his best Capt'n Dickie impression!

Notice that Adam didn't look to thrilled with what was about to be let loose......


~ August 1st, 2003 ~

The look of a man on the edge!

On the edge of what we don't know, but on the edge none the less.

During the Council Meeting on July 18th, 2003, Sherry thought it was cute the way Jeffie and David were so seriously discussing the fine art of power belching!
On July 11th, 2003, Jeffie was astounded by the vigorous way Rob was hammering down his 200th Jell-O shot!

This photo of Jeffie on June 6th, 2003 is nice but if you look just over his shoulder, you'll see his two friends plotting against him!

Could this could be used in court?
Dave Chuckie

~ May 23rd, 2003 ~

When you see these two talking together, you should run and find cover as soon as possible!

Don't worry, it was just the stench that made Jeffie look that way on May 16th, 2003. It causes ones eyes to burn, the sinuses to clog and some people to become violently ill but just getting the chance to talk to The Capt'n was worth it!

During the Council Meeting on May 9th, 2003, Jeffie was happy to show Dave the correct way to place ones pinkie finger under ones glass! Dave was thrilled to learn the proper drinking edict.

Just another perk from being a Council Member!

Jeffie proudly demonstrated just how easy it is to consume an ice cold beverage through ones nose at the Council Meeting on May 2nd, 2003.
The fun sever stopped during the Council Meeting on April 25th, 2003 even though our hero had just broken wind!
At the Council Meeting on April 11th, 2003, Jeffie was:
The answer is:  B. Starring at someone's butt.

A. Soiling himself?

B. Starring at someone's butt?
(More than likely Buck's)

C. About to pass out from Dickie's fumes?

D. Country line dancing?

E. Waiting patiently for another beer?

F. All of the above?

On April 4th, 2003, Jeffie was thrilled with Buckie's new way of saying hello. This unique gesture was submitted to The Council Review Board (TCRB) as the official Council Greeting and is currently being reviewed!

During the Council Meeting on March 28th, 2003, Jeffie and Buck demonstrated the difference between fact and fiction.


"Hi there! I've had three Miller Lite's and now I'm off to White Castle for a sack of burgers. Then on home to make a mess on the floor. Wanna come with me?"

~ March 14th, 2003 ~

Miller Lite
During the Council Meeting on March 7th, 2003, Jeffie was quoted as saying, "If it weren't for it being John's birthday, this meeting might have been a little boring!"
Jeffie, a real man's man who has always been admired by everyone at The Council, caught the eye of of this blond during the Meeting on February 28th, 2003!

During the Council Meeting on February 14th, 2003, Jeffie was either demonstrating why he makes his wife Sharon so happy or that Dickie is actually a pinhead!

Just the thought of high powered, automatic weapons really put a smile on Jeffie's face during the Council Meeting on February 7th, 2003!
Why was there a smile on Jeffie's face during the Council Meeting on January 31st, 2003. He was finally cured of his erectile dysfunction by taking Beaver's advise and buying more high powered weapons!
Wilson 38 Super
Board with the same ol' explosives, Jeffie sought therapy from and expert on January 24th, 2003!
A group of unscrupulous scoundrels were lurking in the shadows during the Council Meeting on January 17th, 2003!
Baby Philadelphia Derringer
Check out Jeffie's 2002 Council Web page here if you dare!
Chuckie Beaver Tracy David John Uncle Gary Dickie Chuckie John Jennifer Aniston Shania Twain Caprice Bourret White Castle Time to Bomb Sadam, Time to Bomb Sadam everybody now! Miller Lite Buck's hand Hooters Buck Thomas Dave Steve Rob Dave Dickie Beaver David Rob David Sherry Adam Derrick Chuckie Dennis Dave Dickie Chuckie Sir Buck-A-Lot Derrick Hershey Ronnie Dave Must be Chuckie Pavel Derrick Uncle Gary Becky Rob John South Park Buck-in-stein David Steve Jamie Buck's hair! John